The Pan Is Still Hot

Sometimes I marvel at our human intellect’s ability to fail to grasp the obvious. Often this is most true when it is my intellect which is involved. In designing and maintaining mechanical marvels and ingenious engineering feats we often exceed the capacity of the material or design on purpose.

We do this so we can understand the limits which we must not go beyond. Once we have established what the limits are, it is not necessary to continue this “failing on purpose” approach. We have learned what we needed to and it is time to move on. The engineers know the limits and can design capabilities up to the proper operating limits.

Our physical bodies have limits as well. God designed us that way. We experience aches and pains because we ask our physical bodies to exceed their design parameters. When I complain to my doctor, he often gives me the same response as those engineers; “If it hurts don’t do it”. In other words, do not exceed the proper operating parameters God has given you. Each of us has different limits at different times in our lives. At a very young age we are pliable and often bend rather than break. As seniors we become stiff and brittle requiring far greater caution. This may apply mentally as well as physically. It is in those “in between” years where we tend to experiment and fail and learn and succeed. Sometimes we are wise enough to learn from the missteps of others. Sometimes we insist that there must be a spot on the wall that requires continually contact with our forehead. In other words we repeat the mistakes we do not learn from.

It doesn’t take superior intelligence to understand that a cast iron skillet on a hot burner is capable of frying more than bacon or eggs. And if there is not a cover on the handle, even though it has nothing frying on it does not mean that it cannot. It is also an important learned understanding that for some time after the burner is turned off the handle on the pan is still hot. If it was painful to touch before it will very likely be painful to touch again; until it cools off. The lesson learned here is “do not” repeatedly touch the hot metal handle of the pan on a hot burner without adequate protection.

Insanity has been defined as doing the same thing over and over again in the same way and expecting different results. You light the burner; place the pan on it, wait for it to heat up to sizzling and grab the handle. It burns. You recoil and curse the pan or the heat or if you are blessed with enough intelligence, your own stupidity. The pan is still hot. It will remain that way until the source of heat is removed and enough time has passed for the laws of thermo dynamics to complete the cool down cycle.

Personal relationships are similar. There are actions and expectations which set the parameters for our interaction. There are understandings and yet to be answered questions which will provide direction and responses which may be either expected or surprising. From a Christian perspective, when we have different theological interpretations, insistence on a single position can spark a heated debate which could lead to a separation.  After a time and more input and perhaps some fatherly advice from others who have already gone done that road, things might cool off a tad. After a reasonable amount of time, with reasonable consideration for the reasonable perspectives of other view points, we might reasonably expect to be able to restore a reasonable level of fellowship. Yet if addressed too soon, it may cause an unintended flare up and rekindled animosities. So we must come to the place where we understand that the pan is still hot.

Romantic relationships can likewise be impacted by differing backgrounds or goals. The Bible talks about the problems of believers and unbelievers being unequally yoked. Many people can testify how those differences have destroyed the profitable relationship they had with the Lord. While we want to draw others closer to God, drifting away from Him does not produce most desirable results. In fact the experiences we have over and over again tell us it is not likely to turn out well. Over and over again means that either someone is not paying attention or not willing to believe the results. A key point to ponder is that which is begun in the Spirit does not end well in the control of the flesh.

Yet, in spite of the learning of our experience, we will go back to another similar relationship. We will approach it with the same naïve expectations. We go down the same path of knowing the differences and insisting they can be worked out and drift further from truth. We will be burned again. We go back to the same church fellowship with the doctrines we clearly understand are contrary to correct interpretation of the Word of God. We settle in and try to agree with enough so that we can somehow fit in yet there is that nagging reality that the truth which is not followed is too much for us to ignore. It festers and heats up to the point where you yank back because you realize the pan is still hot. The smart thing to do would be to find a place to serve where you can agree on the primary doctrines and agree to disagree on the minor issues. Did I mention that our choices are not always the smartest? Perhaps I should have been clearer. The definition of insanity is…

So whether is Fellowship relationships, Personal relationships, Physical or intellectual relationships it is important to remember that there are reasons why the pan got hot and why it stays hot even after the heat of the moment is removed. Sometimes it takes intervention from others with different perspectives, like someone who has been burned and survived. Sometimes it takes stepping back and getting a different point of view over time or distance or perhaps (and I know this is radical) a conversation with the Lord. Since the best source of understanding why the pan is still hot is the source of all knowledge and wisdom, then it might make since to listen to Him.

Sometimes being able to say no to the desire to touch the handle of the cast iron skillet is right. Sometimes saying no to a relationship your flesh desires is right. Sometimes separating from a fellowship because you are at differing levels of understanding is right. Sometimes, but taking time to listen to God the Holy Spirit is always right. He will always tell you when the pan is still hot.