The beginning is a very good place to start. I’m not sure when that was. I do recall that in October of that year I announced to a few close friends and associates that a major change was about to take place. I declared that it was in obedience to what the Lord had revealed to me in our prayer time. So we’ll start there and perhaps I will digress as it seems good to do.
In the several months prior to my announcement, I had noticed a change in both the intensity and frequency of my prayer times. I felt I was not getting the freshness from the scriptures that I had enjoyed for so long. I was actually coming to the Lord with the phrase “I know I haven’t talked to you in a while…”
So in one of our conversations I asked what I thought was the obviously needful question. “Lord Jesus, what is going on in my life that I am just going through the motions of teaching and worshipping and being a Christian in a leadership role?” Anyone can do this for a short time but this had been more than a couple of weeks. I felt His answer was a bit ominous, “Are you sure you want to know?”
My immediate response was that of course I would want to know. But then I replied “What will it cost me to find out?” Now that is really the bottom line for our selfish, me based, concept of the world in which we live. What is in it for me and what will it cost. Then we might consider whether our obedience is a good thing, a “profitable for me” thing. And certainly that means beneficial towards me in the sense of my continuing daily comfort.
His answer was simply “humility”. Now in my mind I could imagine a myriad of scenarios where this could play out. Certainly, anyone who is close to me or has known me for any length of time knows it is an area I struggle with. When people recognize the gifts and talents God has bestowed on someone, it is tempting for them to take some of that glory and praise on themselves as though they have something to do with being used to glorify God. You can read about that in Isaiah chapter fourteen. I don’t want to be arrogant but I sometimes am. I sometimes choose to be. So a little dose of humility might be a good thing for me; in my opinion, a little dose.
I very clearly and distinctly heard the voice of the Lord within my mind saying, “You need to stop teaching both your classes at church for January and February. You cannot tell anyone why you are doing this other than it is in obedience to Me.” He continued “It will cause you shame and you will be seen as failing in the eyes of others. Your loyalty and faithfulness will be questioned and yet you may not defend yourself. You may even be seen as turning your back on the church, your faith and even me. And you may not ask why until you are in obedience“. Continued in Part 2
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